The Sisterhood of the Traveling Aunts

the ethos and fallout of being raised in a litter

All the Usual Suspects.

Large families are a subculture all their own, not something I understood when growing up in one.

Back then, family was just family.

Early in my school years, though, that all-telling look and accompanying question began to raise my awareness of our apparent difference: “You have how many siblings?”

Then, “Ah,” the questioner would hum, once they’d asked a follow-up question and discovered your family was Mormon, Amish, or in our case, Catholic.

Move Over, Waltons

As family size goes, the passing of time has redefined “big.” Later in life I got the same looks for saying my husband and I had six kids as I got growing up for saying I was the youngest of nine.

But no matter how one defines “big,” there are certain advantages and disadvantages that go with families of the large-economy-size variety. On the upside, there is always something going on; on the downside, it can be hard to find privacy at times, as well as difficult to find your niche.

Another positive of kids raised in herds—though like many observations it’s a generality—is that they lean away early from being self-centered. Considering the needs, wants, and aptitudes of others is built-in to the landscape.

Through the years, other people have expressed to me not only their amazement at what it must have been like to grow up among so many siblings, but so too their astonishment that as adults we’ve remained close.

One manifestation of that closeness that seems to surprise a lot of people is a tradition us sisters began the year I was expecting my youngest son.

That first year wasn’t intended as an inaugural event that would last decades; we were just carving out a small space of time away from our busy lives to once again be like we were while growing up: all crammed together in one small space.

1 + 4 (sisters) + 1 (sister-in-law) + 1 (friend) + 5 (nieces) + 1 (great niece) = Sisters’ Weekend 2023

The occasion, soon to become known as Sisters’ Weekend, launched late summer, 1992, in Wildwood, NJ. Thirty-one years later, this week’s Monday Morning Literary Bric-a-Brac comes to you from the latest edition of our storied family tradition—this fall, at a remote cabin in south central Pennsyltucky.

13 Oaks Cabin, Honey Grove, PA

Back in ’92 there were six of us—five sisters and a sister-in-law—but our numbers eventually expanded to include grown daughters and nieces, daughters-in-law brave (or crazy) enough to marry into our boisterous rank, close friends adopted as honorary sisters, and now grown granddaughters. Not everyone can make it every year, but some years we celebrate with as many as sixteen women.

As I’m sure you can imagine, our four-day events, which alternate between shore and mountain settings, involve lots of food, generous libations, endless conversation, and rounds of riotous laughter. Sometimes party games and family-focused reminiscences generate knee-slapping revelations.

Almost inevitably, one generation learns some jaw-dropping revelation about another, expanding our knowledge of and appreciation for all who’ve gathered and grown through the trials and years of our lives.

In more recent years, us “original” six—the “senior sisters” as the younger set now calls us—have come to crave that closer, inner circle of shared sensibility forged by common experiences dating to our own youth, and because of that (and because of the freedom retirement affords) have instituted a second annual event, a spring rather than fall one: OSW (Original Sisters’ Week).

What, the husbands have often asked, can you possibly find to talk about for four days straight, once a year, let alone twice a year?

One answer is…books.

We were raised to be readers and in turn raised our kids to be readers, so there’s always plenty of literary talk to go around. Moreover, we’re also a family of writers, so there’s the constant exchange of ideas that a storytelling gene naturally fosters.

And this year there’s a lot of news on that front, with two original sisters debuting as fantasy novelists and a third—already established as an award-winning playwright—ushering two world premiere plays into production.

But while literary chat has remained a lodestar conversation throughout the years, other topics have waxed and waned across the natural course of time that is the story arc of every life: marriages, births, parenting, aging, and now—yes—death and funerals.

While we don’t necessarily mean to dwell on the macabre, meeting yearly on the cusp of Halloween does lend a certain spooktacular tone to our thoughts, especially when someone shows up in a pair of skeleton pajamas.

Comfy loungewear is always in style.

Another topic more frequently discussed these days than in the past is travel, a luxury often afforded by the benefits of maturity and the healthier bank accounts that sometimes come with it. Being able to travel is a far cry from our early years of serving .25 cent boxes of Kraft macaroni and cheese to our kids twice a week because that’s what we could afford.

Travel talk is especially topical nowadays, since one sister recently relocated to Illinois and another seems bent on busting every globetrotting record previously set. Anymore, there are so many comings and goings that my head’s a-swivel just watching the others traveling madly about, checking boxes off their bucket lists.

Meanwhile, the only buckets on my list seem to be filled with manure.

Some horses produce less manure than others.

While it would be disingenuous to pretend we’ve never had our differences, one important takeaway remains steadfast: I can fight with my sisters all I want, but if you ever try it, grrrl, step back; you’re gonna have to go through me, first.

Blood, after all, really is thicker than water.

Yoga, yogurt, and yo sistahs = as good as it gets.

___________________________

Did you grow up in a litter or raised an only? How did your sibling relationships survive the onslaught of time? I hope you’ll share your thoughts in comments, below.

Remember, there’s no one right way to family.

Meanwhile, let’s congratulate Marie Gauron, who won this past week’s Thursday drawing. Marie joins the year-end drawing to be immortalized as a character in my next novel, the sequel to Shay the Brave, due out in January from Wild Ink Publishing.

You can also learn more about those other literary sisters’ work by checking out K.M. King’s author page and D.W. Gregory’s website.

Thanks so much for visiting with me on another Monday morning. I hope you’ll like, share, comment, and subscribe. Also, if you’re in the Lititz, Lancaster County, PA vicinity on Saturday, November 4^th, I hope you’ll drop in and see me at the Lititz Public Library’s local author expo meet ’n greet from 10-2.

Till next week (and beyond), may all your family interactions warm your heart, ignite your joy, and jumpstart your creative juices.